Chelsea's Getting Married

Who cares? The whole world apparently, or at least enough of the world that even the Times has an article on Chelsea and her boyfriend's announcement.

I hereby take it upon myself to point out that the article's caption under this photo (credited to Gregory Bull/Associated Press) is incorrect:

Chelsea Clinton, 29, and Marc Mezvinsky, 31, shown at the United States Open in 2005, attended the same high school.

Wrong. The person responsible for fact-checking this story needs a stern scolding. Marc went to high school in Pennsylvania; my alma mater, in fact. Chelsea was enrolled at a D.C. school. Marc was a couple years older than me, but we went to a small school and everyone knew everyone.

When I saw one of his classmates this summer, she flippantly remarked, "Marc is a gross man whore. He screwed the entire lacrosse team." This news was not particularly surprising given his sloppy brooding good looks, but erm, we were on that lacrosse team, remember? While I collected my jaw off the ground, she added, "He's only with Chelsea because she's a Clinton." Ouch, I thought.

Marc was a major stoner in high school. He was a bit of a recluse but girls were drawn to him. He stayed out of trouble and evidently did well enough to go to Stanford. At the time, I didn't know anything about him, aside from the occasional gossip surrounding the scandal behind his father and his family's close ties to the Clintons. It must have been rough for him. What it must have been like to grow up in a family of politicians in the spotlight, I will never know.

If there's anything to be learned from this love story, it's this: you can totally smoke all the weed you want in high school because it won't jeopardize your plans to attend a top-tier university, pursue a lucrative career path, and then marry into American royalty.